Monthly Archives: October 2011

Funniest Halloween Trailer

Just in time for all the crappy looking horror movies this year (especially those 3D ones), here’s a parody trailer about the utter stupidity of most horror flicks, and the dumb characters in them that you just hope will die painful deaths for irritating you so much.

JUST DON’T GO INTO THE POOL!

PS See if you can figure out which of the actors is the little kid from Jerry Maguie, but all grown up!

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Halo Anniversary is looking great!

Halo was the first game I bought when I decided to buy my first Xbox all those many years ago, and it still sticks in my mind as one of my favorite gaming experiences. The franchise is getting to the point where they’re kinda running out of story ideas (the last two games didn’t even feature the Master Chief), but then there’s the Anniversary edition of Halo, with completely redone graphics.

Look at the pretty grass!

Is it worth your money? Or is it going to be like that Gus Van Sant remake of Psycho? Well, I wasn’t sure at first, but now I’m pretty sold. I was watching old gameplay footage, and to be honest it doesn’t look that dated or ugly. It still looks pretty alright (even compared to some atrocious current-gen games), but then I saw the new footage, and it’s like… WOW.

It looks so good, and it’s a game I want to get so that I can go through the campaign with my wife. She’s played Halo 3, ODST and Reach with me, so now she can finally play the one that started it all. Well, technically I could’ve always just booted up the old game, but the new graphics give it a much better incentive.

And check out this video too, which directly compares the old and new graphics. The embed seems to be broken though, so click the link.
Comparaison Halo CE / Halo Anniversary by HaloFrance

More screenshots below:



Kinect game rehabilitates stroke victims

The Xbox Kinect was not just a gaming gimmick that was last Christmas’ Tickle-me Elmo; it was a truly ingenious device that opened up a shitload of possibilities. Earlier this year, I saw it being used in an Aphex Twin concert to create some astounding visuals, and now a group of Singaporean students in Temasek Polytechnic have used it to create the Therapy and Rehabilitation Assistant, or TARA.

Helping stroke victims with the Kinect

TARA uses the Kinect’s ability to detect a person’s body movements to help doctors quickly diagnose the severity of a person’s stroke condition. Previously, doctors had to use a ruler to manually measure the range of a victim’s limb movements one at a time.

It then uses some simple mini-games in a tailored TARA program to help rehabilitate the victim, for even further help. Apparently, the group of students (known as “Team ElderGuardian”) took only four months to develop this program.

Not only did TARA give Santa a few more reasons to give these kids something for Christmas this year, but it won the top prize at the Singapore finals of the Imagine Cup, Microsoft’s student technology competition. Of course, back then it was called the Elder Rehabilitation and Support System, which doesn’t have a nice acronym at all.

TARA is currently undergoing pre-clinical trials for commercial use, but I don’t think it’s going to show up at your local gaming store anytime soon.

You know it’s funny: gaming used to cause medical problems, like epileptic fits and obesity, and now it’s gone on to help solve medical problems too.

And just in case you stumbled across this post because you were googling Tara Reid, here’s a wallpaper of her before she got INCREDIBLY trashy, to compensate for your time. No really, there was a time before she was trashy, you know? I just rewatched Van Wilder the other day, and she’s pretty hot back then.

Was this the Tara you were looking for?

 


Blizzcon trailers

So I just finished Starcraft II about 10 minutes ago (yeah, I’m about a year late), and decided I had to go and check out the Heart of the Swarm trailer. And you know what? It rocks! HARD!

So when I was done with that, I figured I’ll check in on WoW and see what the new Mists of Pandaria expansion looks like. And you know what? It looks like it sucks! HARD!

I dunno, it’s just a little bit too Kungfu Panda now, you know? Two Kungfu Panda animated movies have come out (excluding the made-in-China rip-off), and the world is pretty sick of hearing about more crap about China running over toddlers with trucks and poisoning its youth with carcinogenic milk. So yeah, I’m personally pretty sick of the Chinese culture overload, and I’m fucking Asian myself! This expansion looks like a throwaway product pandering to the Chinese gaming community.

So yeah… fuck those pandas. Fuck them in their stupid fat asses.

In the meantime, I can’t wait to get Heart of the Swarm. The Zerg have always been my favorite race, so this one’s a definite pre-order for me.

Kerrigan is going to kick ass!


Which music star would you lose your virginity to?

My brother once told me a story about a friend of his who lost her virginity to James Iha from The Smashing Pumpkins. I’m not a huge fan of the Pumpkins or anything, but that is just an awesome anecdote to be able to drop. Of course, the James Iha story didn’t end too well, as he was a complete jerk who obviously used her for sex, but still it’s a unique anecdote that would be great to share at her future wedding.

On the flip side, if you ask me about my experience and I have nothing to offer except for a story about losing it to my ex-girlfriend, which is the same story as millions of other people out there. However, if I had the chance to rewrite history, I’d probably want a similar story, and these are the Top 5 music chicks (in no particular order) that I’d love to lose my virginity to.

Note that I was a teen of the 90s, so that’s where I’m turning my sights to.

Liz Phair

Wouldn’t you want Liz Phair to be your blowjob queen?

C’mon, anyone around in the 90s would fall hard for Liz Phair. Not only is she a little firecracker of hotness, but her frank and descriptive songs about sex should drive any teen wild. I mean, those lyrics can be pretty filthy… like porno filthy! And what kinda teen boy wouldn’t want to lose their virginity to a potty-mouthed rock star who loves to sing about getting horny and fucking?

Sidenote: My wife and I have an agreement that we’re allowed to have guilt-free extramarital sex with a selected celebrity. Mine is Liz Phair.

Nina Gordon

Music while you cook

If you’re a hot-blooded teen in the 90s and you see the opening shot of the Volcano Girls video where Nina Gordon is thrashing around under the bed covers, that’s just going to stir some shit in your loins. I LOVED that song back then (and still do), and if I was at a Veruca Salt concert and Nina Gordon beckoned for me to go backstage with her, you can bet your ass I’m charging my scrawny ass past those burly security guards.

Belinda Carlisle

Belinda Carlisle

Heaven is a place on Earth

Okay, technically Belinda Carlisle is more of an 80s icon, but she was still active in the 90s, and was still pretty hot then. Her clean-cut pop star image might not be the kind of thing that really gets a guy horny, but she had a totally rocking body with curves in all the right places. But the biggest reason why I put her on this list is because Heaven is a place on Earth is one of those songs that will get airplay till the end of time, and imagine being able to whip out that anecdote about losing your virginity in Belinda’s heaven EVERY TIME you hear that song on the radio.

Lisa Loeb

Glasses are hot

Anyone who was alive in the 90s would’ve totally fallen in love with Lisa Loeb’s Stay. This sweet-looking bespectacled singer might not be like the rocker or hot-bodied girls in this list, but she had her own girl-next-door charms. She wasn’t the kind of girl that would randomly pick a guy to fuck backstage, but she might’ve been the one that you’d bump into at a quiet cafe or hotel bar near the gig venue, and then have a good conversation with and then maybe a nice relationship would follow. Then again, maybe she’d just use you for a one night stand too.

Shirley Manson

Shirley Manson

Alien sex… mmm…

I’ll be the first to admit that Shirley Manson is a little bit weird-looking, but then again, I like that. It’s like the Mena Suvari style of unusual, alien-looking chicks, and she was also pretty mesmerizing in the Queer video. Would she be as hot in the morning when the dark eye shadow is washed off? I dunno, but honestly she’d probably have kicked you out of her hotel room long before you get to that.

Sidenote: Having watched the second season of The Sarah Connor Chronicles, I find Shirley Manson incredibly annoying now.

Almost but no – Jewel

Are you sure she’s not British?

Jewel’s first album is awesomely depressing and I love it to pieces, and she’s got a rack that can blow your mind, but there’s just something about that smile that I can’t get over.

Who would make your list of music stars to lose your virginity to?


Tegan & Sara interlude

And because we don’t have anything funny to say right now, here’s Tegan & Sara to provide the amusement instead.

Why won’t they come and perform in Singapore?

Funny Canadian girls


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