Monthly Archives: December 2011

When bigger boobs aren’t always better

I’m a guy, so I do like boobs like most guys. However, it does kinda annoy me that it seems like a prerequisite for all female videogame characters to have big boobs. Look at Lara Croft, and all the girls from Dead or Alive. In fact, there’s even a setting in this game to adjust the level of boob bounciness! All in all, there are only a handful (no pun intended) of female characters that aren’t big-breasted. I mean, it’s demeaning to assume that all male gamers will just go nuts over some pixels that represent boobs… isn’t it?

Anyway, someone has gone ahead and made a nice animation featuring two of the girls from King of Fighters (the big-breasted Mai Shiranui and the more reasonably-chested Yuri), explaining the dangers of having such large breasts in videogames. Not all of the reasons make sense (especially towards the end), but the first half of the video is still pretty funny.


Have a Gothic Christmas!

I was driving my parents’ car this morning, and had no choice but to listen to regular radio stations, and Gold 90.5 FM were pretty much playing Christmas songs non-stop. I mean, I know it’s Christmas and all, and I love the season, but that sorta bugged me a lot.

Anyway, I just felt compelled to look up some non-traditional Christmas songs, and found this one. Enjoy!

Merry Gothic Christmas, folks!

Have yourself a Gothic Christmas!


The Hobbit and Dark Knight Rises – two boring trailers

Two new trailers hit us recently, and as much as I want to watch these movies, the trailers really really suck.

I’m talking about The Hobbit and The Dark Knight Rises. It’s like, they really didn’t put any effort into making these interesting at all. It’s like some marketing exec just said: “Fuck effort. People will watch these movies anyway… let’s just dump some cool looking shots together and call it a day. Now let’s go snort some coke!”

Two boring-assed trailers

Halfway through the Hobbit’s trailer, it’s really just some guys caroling. Is that supposed to make me want to watch the movie?

The Dark Knight Rises trailer is worse – it’s really just a sampling of random dialogue that reveals nothing about the plot, plus one really cool shot of a football field collapsing behind a guy scoring a touchdown. I mean, that shot is really fucking cool. But it also tells me nothing about the movie, except that there’s going to be a scene in a football stadium.

Anyway, here are the trailers. I’m going to watch these movies anyway, cos I know they’re going to rock… but still that’s no excuse to skimp on the trailers.


6 wedding songs we’d like to hear

Britney Spears and Jason Alexander

Is this the marriage you want?

My wife and I are at the stage in our lives where we are increasingly attending more and more weddings, as friends and cousins get hitched. One thing we’ve noticed is that the music played tends to be more or less the same. It’s always Jason Mraz, it’s always that Bruno Mars song that really shouldn’t be in any sensible wedding… you know the one I’m talking about.

About-to-be-married couples please take note: the chorus of Marry You is romantic enough, but listen to the verses and realize that the marriage described in the song would be something like Britney’s 55-hour marriage to Jason Alexander. In fact, if Britney’s marriage had taken place 7 years later, she totally would’ve played Marry You as she marched down the aisle of a cheap Vegas chapel.

“If you wake up and wanna break up, that’s cool.” – Marry You, Bruno Mars

Anyway, I thought about the kind of songs that I’d like to hear at weddings, so I put together a quick list of not-so-overplayed songs that would be great for weddings.

Meat Loaf – I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)

Okay, a lot of you have a preoccupation with that “that” is in the song, but really that’s not important. What’s important is that this is an epic rock song, with motorcycles, cops, vampires, and… wait, that’s just the music video. Even so, the lyrics in the song are awesome!

G: Will you cater to every fantasy that I’ve got?
Will you hose me down with holy water, if I get too hot?
Will you take me to places that I’ve never known?

B: I can do that!

For the record, if you listen closely to the lyrics towards the end, he does indeed say what “that” is.

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Kat Dennings is stealthily stacked

I sat through Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist and Thor, and I knew that Kat Dennings was in both of them. I thought she was a funny, up and coming indie actress who could possibly go the Parker Posey route when it comes to her Hollywood career progression.

What I didn’t realize was that she was hiding these sweater puppies the entire time. I mean… where did they come from? How did I not notice these things throughout those two movies? Was I incredibly distracted by the dialogue, or are they imbued with stealth technology? What’s her bra size? 42F-117?

Kat Dennings and her epic cleavage

Apparently there are some nude pics of her leaked onto the Internet too. I won’t put those up here, but you can go ahead and Google them yourself.


A bad day for train commuters

The big news in Singapore right now is the big SMRT debacle, when trains in the city have been breaking down repeatedly during one of the most popular shopping periods of the year. The power went out, and it got so stuffy in the trains that someone had to smash a window with a fire extinguisher.

Smashed window on the MRT.

People on the Internet are understandably angry, and have been calling for the SMRT CEO Saw Phaik Hwa to admit her errors, step down, or maybe commit seppuku as penance.

While this breakdown is a pretty big deal, it isn’t the worst thing that could happen to you while commuting on the train. Check out these train rides that are guaranteed to put a bigger downer on your day than the power going out for a few hours.

Batman Begins

So you’re on your way home for the evening, and then suddenly Qui-Gon Jinn hijacks your train and loads it up with some giant device that’s going to unleash Scarecrow’s fear gas all over the city. That’s bad. Then Batman turns up, beats the crap out of him, and then Gordon blows up the rail lines with the Tumbler (aka the new Batmobile) and the train comes tumbling down (no pun intended).

Spiderman 2

It’s a regular day in the city, and you’re probably headed out to lunch. Suddenly a giant octopus man rips the controls apart and sends the train over to impending doom. And the only person that can stop the train and save everyone is a guy who shoots webs out of his hands. Webs. Spiderwebs are going to somehow stop a train.

Modern Warfare 3

You’re standing on a train platform, patiently waiting for your train. Suddenly, the PA system starts telling you that there’s a disturbance on the tracks and the train schedule might be affected. You get pissed off, and you wait. The PA repeats its message, with no clarification on what’s delaying the trains. You wait even longer, and you get more pissed off. Then a train full of Russian terrorists zooms by, trading gunfire and rockets with a pick-up truck full of bitter, trigger-happy renegade spec-ops soldiers.

Wanted

Now we’re in a country-side train, and two crazed gunmen start “curving bullets” around your head. And when you think everything’s better, Angelina Jolie crashes a car into the train.

Ninja

This is probably the tamest of the bunch as it’s just some ninjas fighting thugs on a train, but imagine you’re the handicapped guy at 2:31. If getting your peaceful train ride interrupted by thugs wasn’t bad enough, you also get your crutch snatched from you by a ninja-girl. And furthermore, she’s not even that good looking.

Hobbies include stealing crutches from handicapped people


Top 5 Christmas Movies

Christmas is just around the corner, and we’ve only just finished getting presents for everyone. Right about now would be a good time to kick back, relax, and put on some Christmas-themed movies to watch. We tried to make it a tradition to watch Home Alone every year, but that never quite worked out. Maybe we’ll get it done this year though.

But there are plenty of other Christmas movies to be watched, and here, in no particular order, are five of my favorite Christmas movies.

Home Alone (1990)

Because of this movie, Macauley Culkin made a massive name for himself and started flooding the screens with a ton of crappy movies until everyone got sick of him. But that should not diminish the greatness of this movie at all, because you can never get sick of the sugary sweetness, mixed with the hilarity of watching Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern fall on hard objects again, and again, and again!

Die Hard (1988)

Not a single Santa Clause appears in this movie, yet this is pretty much the first film that comes to my mind whenever I think of Christmas. Why? Because the movie is awesome, and really set the standards for action films to follow, and because of that last scene, where they play “Let it Snow” over the end credits. It’s just a perfect way to end a Christmas movie.

Love Actually (2003)

When it comes to plain heart-string-pulling sappiness, nothing beats Love Actually. It throws something like ten different heartwarming stories at you, and you’re bound to relate to at least one of them. And then of course, there’s this song!

Gremlins (1984)

Everybody knows that getting someone a pet for Christmas is a bad idea. Pets are living creatures, and shouldn’t be given to someone that might not be responsible or loving enough to look after them. An even worse idea is to give them a pet that turns into vicious, rapidly-multiplying creatures whose sole purpose it is to trash things. But still, Mogwai is cute as hell.

Mogwai in a Christmas hat

Sooo cute!

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (2005)

This is probably the least Christmasy movie on this list, but still, it’s funny, it’s got great chemistry between Robert Downey Jr and Val Kilmer, and it’s got Michelle Monaghan running around in this outfit for quite a while.

Santarina with a gun


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